Yes, people. I'm here with my sucky face. Hahahahahaha.
i thought about quite abit last night before I get to bed and sleep.
But first, let's enjoy some sucky face of mine before I rant more
bout my thoughts. Sigh ~
This pic above looks more like me in real life lah. Fat, kiddish, whatever.
The rest of the pics are more of dark and blurry that's why pretty.
This one is better. Hahahahahaha.
One day my gf, gracey came over to my place with her hair in nice curl
& she told me she went over to see xiaxue's blog and try it out.
It really works and so I tried too....
But maybe my hair's too short and maybe too many layered
or maybe I used a rubber band instead of scrumbies.
I didn't get what I wanted in the end. Hahahahahahaha.
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Okay now, time for my thoughts?
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Okay, this is just some of the shit stuffs I pondered about last night.
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The two most important guys in my life including myself is up on the
newspaper. -.-
Okay, this is nothing to brag about and be so proud of it. Because it's
not something so good to be proud of.
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Seriously , I would rather we'd all be living in our own world
now rather than be in the newspaper and let people in forum
talk shits bout us when they-know-nothing-at-all.
WTF WTF WTF WTF.
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Yes, I seriously think I'm a jinx. Know why? I will tell you people why
later in the posts. I know you people will definitely comfort me with good
words like, "oh come on, don't be so silly." or rather, "why think like that? you're not !"
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But okay okay, let's put aside those good comforting words and really
really imagining you, yourself in my shoe.
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Would you not have the thought that you're a jinx when the two most
important guys you had in your life left you?
& what's ironical is that before they both left and stay un-contact-able
I was the one they were with. -.-
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& the worst thing was .......
It was both their birthday !!!! :(
One was days before his 22nd birtday.
& the other was on the 20th birthday itself.
Tell me, would you not find yourself a jinx cursing others
if you were me?!
:(
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& you know, after thinking bout it, I started to thought, why was I
not the one who's leaving since the three of us is in the newspaper !
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& then, suddenly these silly thoughts came to my mind.....
Okay , it really is silly but you know, life is so unpredictable
& things always happen unexpectedly when you seems to be
enjoying life out there.
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Anyway, I thought that maybe it's because my time is not up yet.
Cause you know since both happen was near to their birthday.
So , I thought....
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Maybe something would happen to me on my 21st birthday?
Maybe before? Maybe on that day itself? Maybe after?
Cause......
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1. Weihao is before his 22nd brithday.
2. Defeng is on his 20th birthday itself.
Therefore, my conclusion is, for me, I guess most probably
would be after my 21st birthday.
Sounds ironical?
before, itself and after.
22nd, 20th and 21st.
Hahahahahahahahhaha.
Okay, maybe I really think abit too much. -.-
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Ehhhh , not bad. At least still can celebrate my very big day before
I'm gone for good. :x
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& the things I thought about what might happen to me was.....
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-Maybe two months later, by the time I need to remove this Ilizarov
thingy and I died during my op? D:
-Okay, or maybe I might be able to walk already and one day when I'm walking
on the road, I kena bang by the car and got involved in a RTA again
& die.
-OR MAYBE, two months later, the doctor tells me the Ilizarov couldn't help me get
back to walk and get back on my feet again then I depression & jump down, commit
suicide & die. -.-
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Whatever it may be, I hope to die without the Ilizarov and I hope
I would die an instant death. As in, if really is die in a RTA, please
bang me and let me fly far far away and hit my head and instant die
can. I wanna learn to fly before I die.
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Yaaaa ~ Like I can get to choose like that. -.-
& things always don't turn out the way I wanted it to be.
Most probably, I'll kena bang and then go hospital,
waste another few days and then die. Then, waste my mummy's
money AGAIN. :(
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Yes, so please please please. If want, jiu let me die without
spending more of their money. Maybe money on my funeral all
theses cannot be help lah. But please don't waste money trying
to help me revive and in the end..... zzzzzz.
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Therefore, I think I should take more pictures and record more
of my beautiful voice singing & create as many websites
as I can and write down many many things as I can
so that the next time
if something really suay suay *touch wood*
happen, people still can reminisce me in so many ways. :D
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Anyway, that's just all bout my thoughts lah.
I just feel I'm a jinx myself.
& if really nothing happens to me on my big birthday
& I gets to live to the age of 60 yrs old,
I swear I'm not gonna let any more guys become important
in my life anymore.
PLEASE.
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& I wonder, why are all the bad things happening to me
& when will the good things starts to come?
2010 really sucks to the core.
I hope 2011 would be better and not sucks more than anything else !
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I don't want to lose anymore important people. :(
That feeling sucked, ttm.
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Okay, that's about all for my what-it-may-seems-to-be
my silly thoughts. :D
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Bye people and off I go now to hardcore tumblr-ing !
Hahahahahahhahahha.
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pssss ~ you know what?
I found out that xinmsn not only can catchup channel
8 shows only. Also can catchup channel 5. I'm so gonna go
catch "the two of us" already .
BYE !!!!! :)
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