kammygkx

when ii meet baby ytd ,, she was crying and crying non-stop . Hate to sis like this . While i am there, feeling useless . haiis . it doesn't bother me anymore . i'm not important to him anymore . so dun think he will be reading my blog anymore . haiis .

when ii saw baby crying , ii was thinking myself . why didn't ii cry ? Was it b'cus i knew i'm at fault ? am ii really at fault ? or have ii cried enough fer him ? i dunno . There wasn't any tears for me to drop . my heart has shattered to powder . it could never be back to pieces again .

ii knew what ii was going to change . my ATT . but do euu think ii love showing my att ?! love quarreling with him ? ii hate it . be'cus ii know it will cause us to break but what to do ? it really is hard to control . especially when euu care fer the person so much . and ii shouldn't talk to any guys anymore . ya ? even his fren ii also must talk less . But will that be of any use if ii change ? he won't be back anymore . he told me he dun wanna be soft-hearted again. So obvious rite . haiis . think just change ba . even if he will not be back ,, it will do me good . if ii find other guys ,, it would be better . but of cus it won't be so soon . i still have a long way to go . TO FORGET HIM ! maybe if ii change ,, there's still a 1% that he will come back ? haiis . ii won't pin too much hope .

ARGHHH ! miss him so much . feel like calling him to meet up . but ii know he doesn't want to see me now . i'll just have to wait for his call . i'm sure he will call me if he wanna meet . but if he doesn't ,, i really have to let go . ii saw him on msn . feel like chatting with him . but dunno what to sae . so just send him those photos that we take . haiis . he din approve . din reply . think he also cllose the window le ba . haiis . dunno what to do now . Time has already run out for a happy ending .

so what happen today ? i was totally shag . even kelly knew sth has happen to me . and she ask me so ii told her . he was on my mind so ii couldn't really concentrate on my work . haiis .why ?? why why why why why !!! ii didn't wish things to turn out lidat . ii'm AFRAID . he would find another girl soon . it's always lidat . haiis . ii dun wanna wait anymore . if he really does , ii won't bother him anymore . go for his happiness . i'm tired of waiting and yet things turn out to be the same . and making him more pissed off of me . i dun wanna stuck in this circle . ii wanna be happy too . ii admit that i'm happy when i'm with him . but it's just certain things . he cares for me ii admit . ii just dun feel the love he has towards me . he sae he was drunk so din msg me but how come he could play dota when he reach cuppage and why can't he give me a msg when he's abit awake ? is it that diff to type a msg ?

haiis . ii dun wanna think much . it would only hurt more . haiis . tears just drop today . when ii read baby's blog . she sae she isn't as strong as me . and my heart ache . yes ,, my heart do ache . but ii'm not as strong as her . ii just dun wanna brood over it . no point . he won't be back anymore . he's given me alot of chance ii know . ii shouldn't be too much asking fer more . ii din know how to love . ii wasn't a good gf . so much so to sae . haiis .

the three happy girls turns out to have the same fate over the same thing .